Such a small amount has so many calories...
...so little actual sustenance....
Chocolate you have nothing good to offer me but flavor and FAT.
Yet I love you so.
Isn't it amazing that usually the lowest calorie foods are the best for you? Wouldn't you think that the more calorie content it has, the more life-sustaining it should be?
Imagine...
300 calorie spinach, 1000 calorie bananas....
35 calorie pizza, 50 calorie burgers...
Sorry. Its been a while since I've had time to blog, and I'm in a muse-y mood. The second week of December, I worked a 70 hour week. 12 hour days, and an 8 hour Saturday (in the middle of a blizzard that stranded me at a friends house for added fun). What a nice check...but fuck if I wasn't so dog tired on Sunday.
Last week was a lot of work too, I organized a Secret Santa at work and was in charge of other Santa-related work activities. Morale boosting is a lot of work! No wonder they don't try anymore.
I was doing so good foodwise at the beginning of the month, but I've kind of been in an eating phase lately. It sucks, and I'm struggling to get my focus back. This happens often around the holidays, especially the phase between Thanksgiving and Christmas, because I get it stuck in my head that "I'll just make up for it after Christmas when all the eating holidays are over with". Luckily, logic that twisted hasn't TOTALLY fucked up my weight, although I've been swinging between 140-144 lbs, when I was doing pretty good staying below 140 for a while. I need to get back there.
I read in a WebMD magazine today that people who drink two glasses of water before they eat are more likely to lose weight (and more quickly too) than their non-water-drinking friends. I think we already knew that, but if I had made a point to remember the actual statistics instead of quoting something I don't know anything about like a moron, this paragraph would have been a lot more groundbreaking.
I played a trick on myself today, on accident. I ate half a can of soup and put the rest in the fridge, but I counted the calories for the whole can. I came home and was rummaging through the fridge looking for that magical elusive low calorie hunger stomper, when I came across the soup and thought "Dammit, I wish I could eat that." Then I thought "Oh yeah, I CAN eat that!" since I'd already counted the calories, I wasn't any worse for wear than if I would have broken my caloric limit for the day. So that gave me an idea for foods like that, count all the calories but put away half of it for later. That way when I come home from work like a hungry monster, instead of binging on something I can finish what I started and not fuck myself. Whaddya all think of that?
So anyways, I've been busy working hard for my money lately, and haven't made much time for blogger. I think the longer I stay away, the more I eat. Blogging is kind of like thinspo, being surrounded by like minded individuals. I have time tonight because Josh is working a double shift and won't be home until the wee hours of the morning, so I can catch up on all I've missed lately, and look up some thinspo, and hopefully avoid the gnawing hunger.
I wanted to scream at my body today. I ate at noon (a large sandwich and some soup) and by 5 I was hungry again. That was probably a 1000 calorie meal (I'm not entirely sure how much, so I was generous with my estimates) and I was tired and weak and fuzzy-brained and all the other hunger symptoms combined, and I wanted to scream "I fucking fed you today! Knock it the hell off!" Sometimes a meal that big will carry me through the day with no hunger, and sometimes the hunger is there 3 hours later.
I feel like I haven't been taking good care of myself lately. I haven't taken any vitamins in who-knows-how-long and I think it would make me feel more balanced. Maybe the hunger monster wouldn't hit me so hard if my electrolytes were balanced and my brain was fed with some tasty thought food (vitamins, not actual food).
Ooh! Juicy! I'm watching my all time favorite horror movie, and one of my top favorites of all time in general, THE SHINING.
"Heeeere's Johnny!"
Ok, well. I'm going to catch up on all y'alls lives. I've missed blogging!
Peace
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5 comments:
i always push off my weight loss, well it's christmas now so there's no point it now i'll do it later. later just pushes off reaching our goals...so frustrating, i know how you feel.
i love that plan, count all the calories but eat it throughout the day. if i remember to do it once i've prepared food, i'm going for it.
i think we all know a bunch of weightloss facts but we tend to forget them all when the binge monster attacks. hey disordered eating messes up our thinking capability and we have a right to use it as an excuse lol
stay strong
The shining scares me- still. as an adult. yikes.
you've still come a long way from where you were not that long ago! :) remember when we were both in the 150s? and now we're in the 140s and soon we'll be in the 130s for GOOD!
also, sometimes I eat a HUGE meal early in the day (like, 11-12) and then I dont eat again the whole day 'cause it makes me so full..
and sometimes it backfires because I get hungry that evening and I've already used all my calories.
I hate scary movies, ha.
I get frozen 100% natural edamame from the grocery store. One serving (which is quite a bit in my opinion) is about 110 to 120 calories. I add more calories because I eat it with soy sauce. I eat it a couple times a week :)
things with the husband are pretty good! We had a great big fight and I threw a great big fit, and he gave into all my demands (although now his family is pissed) and I think hes realized he would rather have me and no babies than not have me at all. I've been keeping my crazy a little more in check.
basically, I predict things will be amazing when he gets home and he wont even be thinking about babies.
especially if I get under 140 by the time he gets back!
I really needed the comment you left me. Thanks.
I hatehateHATE holiday eating. And I hate how gaining a few pounds, even if it's just two, is enough to make me freak out.
I like your soup idea! I'm gonna try tricking myself sometime...
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